Hari ini untuk kesekian kalinya aku sangat bingung mengevaluasi akan self worth diri sendiri. I feel like i have given my all, pushing myself to a level I never knew exist only to prove that I am worth to live, eat and sleep on government's payroll. Bosan dan tertekan.. i so hate and love this place.
So, melayan kesedihan hati sambil menonton Kath and Kim ni sedikit sebanyak buat aku rasa tenang le sket. After this 'How I Met Your Mother' plak. It's always a black monday until TV time. Hmm..perhaps I should follow advice mantan PBP AGC untuk mencebur dan meleburkan diri dalam bidang penyiaran nih. Tapi mengenangkan azan solat tah kemana suatu waktu dahulu bila sibuk di konti and mixing studio, perhaps ada baiknya untuk terus ditindas dan diperas. Apa-apa pun bersabar itu separuh dari iman..
Though don't get me wrong, it's not I am not happy working there. I am glad to know people I have known, to go through the hurdles and to be part of the dynamic system that made the organisation even all i did is dotting the 'i' and crossing the 't'. tapi ada waktu dan ketika rasa memang rasa nak belajar ilmu ghaib supaya boleh menyendiri. My mind is so not used to be cluttered so rasa begitu tut tut dan slupid bila didesak-desak dengan pelbagai perkara. Macam mana lah nak survive sampai bersara?
Hmmm..camno?
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sis.. both of you need vacation. seriously.
ReplyDeletecamana nak vacation....cuti sakit pun telepon tak berenti-renti tutututut
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