Self-pitying Nonsense (As Per G)

I was called a self-pitying nonsense by someone who is dear to my heart till 5 minutes before this word were uttered. I'm wallowing in self-pity..what a pathetic being I must be.

Why? I don't know but maybe that is the ugly truth I need to swallow. However, with a sliver of dignity left, I had erased all contacts to this being. Well, I accept negativity and condemnation, but the hurts make it too much to bear. I need to severe ties in order to nurse my wounded pride.

Well, I looked up in wikepedia about the definition of self-pity, not that I don't know but it is a sweet torture to my pathetic existence. For this, I shall remember that sometimes, some people are just not worthy....and that is more pathetic than me. I seek attention though it was not me who promised to pursue friendship and keeping the memory alive even after circumstances change. And what I get for being me?

A title : Self-pitying Nonsense..

Damn..I do fell like I'm a load of BS.

I hate you..hate you to the core of my very being.
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Self-pity is the psychological state of mind of an individual in perceived adverse situations who has not accepted the situation and does not have the confidence nor ability to cope with it. It is characterized by a person's belief that he or she is the victim of events and is therefore deserving of condolence. Self-pity is generally regarded as a negative emotion in that it does not generally help deal with adverse situations.

Self-pity is a way of paying attention to oneself, albeit negatively; it is a means self-soothing or self-nurturing ("I hurt so much").

Social-Learning theorists purport that self-pity is a method for gaining attention, probably as a child, where an individual received attention, support, and nurturing while being sick or hurt. The child then grows up having learned to give attention to oneself (or ask for attention from others) while in real or dramatized distress to receive the same payoff. Thus, another form of self-sustainment can be sympathy offered by others: "oh, you poor thing." This is particularly true of individuals who exhibit sociopathic or psychopathic tendencies[citation needed] and rely on the sympathy offered by others as a means to manipulate.

The nature and depth of human pride are illuminated by comparing boasting with self-pity. Both are manifestations of pride. Boasting is the response of pride to success. Self-pity is the response of pride to suffering. Boasting says, “I deserve admiration because I have achieved so much.” Self-pity says, “I deserve admiration because I have sacrificed so much.” Boasting is the voice of pride in the heart of the strong. Self-pity is the voice of pride in the heart of the weak. Boasting sounds self-sufficient. Self-pity sounds self-sacrificing.

The reason self-pity does not look like pride is that it appears to be needy. But the need arises from a wounded ego, and the desire of the self-pitying is not really for others to see them as helpless, but as heroes. The need self-pity feels does not come from a sense of unworthiness, but from a sense of unrecognized worthiness. It is the response of unapplauded pride